When I first met my lover
I just couldn't see the harm,
of finding my girlfriend
in a field on a farm.

My family dis-owned me
said they didn't know how,
I could give up my life
you see Daisy's a cow.

I said to my wife
" She makes more sense than you,
one stamp for a yes
and for no it's a moo".

Her hide is so smooth
and to me feels like silk,
Plus she's got several nipples
and gives shitloads of milk.

My wife said " It's gross,
and you look such a fool."
She said " What about sex?"
I said " I stand on a stool."

My friends say she's ugly
but that's a bit harsh.
I'll concede she's bow legged
and has a full grown moustache.

Jealousy is all consuming
when it raises it's head.
But me and Daisy are happy
in our comfy cowshed.