I was driving home from work one day,

The weather had turned cold.

A monster and his family

Went and jumped into the road.

Their seven heads (one hadn’t yet grown)

Looked up and down the car.

And the father (at least I think it was)

Asked, “Are you going far?”

Now, what to say on that cold day,

To monsters in the road,

With fifteen arms (I’d lost my count)

And skin as gold as…well, gold?

“I’m going home to my warm house,

It’s only small,” I said.

The mother monster (she had long hair)

Said, “We only want a bed.”

So in they climbed, the four of them,

Their nineteen legs were squashed.

I left a window open

Because I don’t believe they’d washed.

We drove through snow, they never spoke,

Except to ask my name.

And to say that they were Schmoogles

And from whereabouts they came.

And they asked me if I knew at all

Of the spotted Ignaroo.

I thought about it for awhile

And said, “I don’t believe I do.”

They said that was a shame because,

The night being so cold…

And then another monster

Went and jumped into the road.

“The Ignaroo!” my monsters cried

(I was quite attached by then).

I stopped the car and, of the

Ignaroo, I counted ten.

My house was small, oh that was true,

But my car was smaller still.

But the Ignaroo just clambered in

And we lumbered up the hill.

We all shook hands, my monsters,

The Ignaroo and me.

And then a tiny monster asked,

“Excuse me, what’s for tea?”

“I hadn’t thought of that,” I said,

But then I passed a sign

Which read ‘Monster Supermarket Sale‘,

So I thought that would do fine.

Have you ever shopped for monsters?

It’s no fun with wonky wheels.

But seven trolleys later

I had fourteen monster meals.

Returning to the car

With monsters squished and squashed inside,

Mmm…where to put the shopping

Whilst continuing the ride?

There was just one small place empty

And, my arms weighed down with fruit,

I opened up the rear

To find twelve monsters in the boot.

“Hello, we are the Grinsters.

Nice to meet you. How d’you do?

The Schmoogles and the Ignaroo

Said we were welcome too.”

I closed the boot, well what to do?

Where would all of this stop?

And, opening up the driver’s door,

I said, “You all have to move up!”

And they all did. The monsters

Really are a bendy race.

There were knees and elbows and other bits

Crammed into every face.

The trolleys finally emptied,

I squeezed into my car,

And started on my way again,

“It isn’t very far.”

Ten minutes later we arrived.

I stopped the engine there,

And asked the monsters to get out,

Then climbed out of my chair.

And so the monsters followed me,

Schmoogles and Ignaroo,

Exploding from my little car,

Each carrying some food.

“Don’t forget the Grinsters,”

A little monster said.

And then the boot flew open

And bonked me on the head.

When I awoke the house was quiet,

No monster was in sight.

It must have been a dream, I thought

I climbed the stairs and brushed my teeth.

How good to be at home.

With the snow and wind so wild outside,

How nice to be alone.

I climbed in bed, and felt some fur.

But I didn’t have a pet.

And suddenly…twenty six loud voices cried…

“IS BREAKFAST READY YET?!”